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A week of going home early and boredom has morphed me into an emo-shit. Seeing the home not as bright as before made the house susceptible to gloom and sadness. It has been more than a week since my aunt has been to the hospital leaving me always alone at home and doing chores. I have to be home early because I need to guard the house from any nasty infiltrators of dusts and germs. Sacrifice is the least of a slacker can do.

Since then, I am not able to have my stroll around the mall or hangout with my friends. I have made a lot of refusal to attend several nightouts and occasions. My college friends went to Serendra on the day of the emergency and that’s why I was not able to accompany and have some pictures that would be posted in the net. Pity me. I already rehearsed my poses and smiles that day. I am not in the frames of Multiply again.

I wasn’t able to attend Shari’s pre-birthday bash last Saturday night. Though my cousins invited me to have a booze also the same night, I refused because at troubled times I don’t drink. The cable channels were my sole comfort that night. I did try astral projection but porn dominated my thoughts that’s why I couldn’t project my soul to those destinations. Anyway, my soul wouldn’t be translated into their pictures so why bother. I could use photoshop instead.

As I said earlier, I don’t drink when depressed. I dunno, but it’s quite ironic of me. I should be drowning myself with alcohol—not isoprophyl—at times like this. But hell no, my tastebuds can’t take the bitterness of any liquor. I only push drinking to my limits when I’m ecstatic and in the zone. The dry spell from alcohol is effective during these moments. So now, I’m thirsty for joy—a wholesome joy, not the one that can be achieved through sex or masturbation.

The gang is planning for the coming long weekend. Let’s wish I can be there. My brain’s juices is not that talented to project my spirit into the astral plane. It can only manifest myself in wet dreams.

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13 Comments

  1. It’s one of those days. Just dwell on it for now. Don’t worry about the time when you’ll be happy again. It’ll come.

  2. I KNOW what you mean. I haven’t hung out with my friends in almost a month and goodness gracious that’s a pretty long time. I drink if there’s booze. Depressed or not depressed. Hahahah.

    Anyway, I’m sure you’ll be able to go soon and have fun fun fun 🙂 Just gotta keep your fingers crossed! Plus, the good part is you’ve actually saved up your moolahhhh.

  3. Doc Tess,
    Thanks. So far, my optimism hasn’t diminished to it’s critical level.

    Juice,
    Oh yeah, I have saved enough greens here. I just forgot to type it down.

  4. Would you like to have a fresh stick of ciggie, instead? Cheer up.

  5. There was a time I became so depressed because I only get to do sacrifices. At that time, people are like drawing away from me. But I guess that my pessimism took over me again.

    As for you case… I think only time will tell, Mr. Agent Grey. Cheer up, my friend. When the time comes, go and get wasted! 😀

  6. Cheer up, Mr. Grey!

  7. Alex,
    Sorry I don’t smoke. Thanks!

    Ian & Jhed,
    Don’t worry, I have not lost my optimism. I am just somehow frustrated because I can’t hang out. This is the time when DVD’s are handy!

  8. Hey Cheer Up! Everything will be alright in God’s time! Aja!

  9. Don’t drink when depressed. Really dangerous. I’ve done a a couple of mistakes because of drinking depressed. Another story. I like your idea, DVD’s are your best friend during times you can’t socialize! 🙂

  10. Err, in my book, masturbation and sex are pretty much “wholesome,” nirvana at its most cloud nine-ish state, perhaps. So how can they be otherwise? Screw that mentality, I say! *insert evil laugh*

    You sad, sad bastard, you. Word of advice: Don’t ponder on your current state too much as it will pass eventually, else suffer the consequences i.e. clinical depression, social withdrawal, erectile dysfunction, and worse, loose bowel movement!!! You don’t want any of that, do ya?

    May the gods of eternal joy be with ye, my brotha. Amen.

  11. When i’m depressed i eat chocolates. Try it. Sometimes i drink alcohol. Most of the time, coffee. And i feel better afterwards.

    I’m not saying that you don’t drink when you’re into some personal dilemma or something. It’s actually more suicidal, especially when you do it alone. In case you really want to guzzle your problems away, give us a buzz and we’ll be there in no time flat. Haha.

  12. DVDs are your best friends! Hahaha. Try to preoccupy yourself at home.. like.. uhmm. eating. and.. uhm.. uhh. eating. yeah. i think that’s wholesome enough! hahaha.

  13. Woah! I’m extremely overwhelmed. Everyone is cheering me up. Thank you all. Now let’s move this emo-shitness out of my system. Cheers to all!


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