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Monthly Archives: April 2005

Some people think that creativity is limited who are gifted with talent; that is creativity itself. But what they don’t see they too can be artistic and creative in their own way. Some also compare their skills with others, which mostly, should not be. Creativity has its own characteristics, just like the person who has this. All creativity is equal, and none is higher than the other. If one can draw, all else can. If one can sing, all else can. If one can dance, all else can. If one can write, all else can. Each can do all these things. They may not look "better" than the other, but it is much BETTER on how they do it. Art is God-given, and it is not limited to us. Before, we thought that flying for humans was impossible, but now it was made possible. We may be amazed on how others made those things, but don’t you think you can do it? Trust with yourself. We may be called left-brainer or right-brainer, but one won’t work without other. Art and Creativity has no limitation, we don’t have limitations, even the world has no limitations. We are the only one who limits and prohibits ourselves. Now, who do you think limits you?

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I think I should go, I think I should not. Something holds me back and I don’t know what it is. It maybe just me. What’s stopping me to do what I want. I guess it’s the risk. I always look for a safe way. But becoming careful leads me more to danger. I know that I needed to change. I know it’s the time that I should look for a better career. But what stops me from doing it? Maybe it’s the fear of losing a job. Maybe it’s the fear of what other’s may say. I fear a lot of these, and paranoia starts to rule over my head. I’m a bad decision-maker. Making a choice is not easy for me… but if risk is the only way, I should go for it.

Having a life is easy, but getting a life is hard.

Living in this country is hard. You need to make money for a living. For bosses, they think that life is very easy for us workers and employee. But they don’t know how hard we strive just to earn. I understand that not all bosses are not that bad, but I guess I end up with that one. I have entered in a company that I don’t really know who the people behind it. I am excited to start and have great expectations within the company. I started there having fun, even with all the stress I gathered in the work, I loved it. But then, as time progresses, the darkness of the company goes stronger, shutting down the lights that I used to have. I have used all my potentials for that company, even my loyalty I gave to them. But the people behind it was not worthy of any loyalty and hardship I gave. Each day I wake up, I feel all of the world’s weight is on me. The stress that I used to love starts to crawl up to my head bringing out the worst of me. I have changed since I started in this company. I’m starting to dislike my evolution, my mutation.

Now, I’m planning to move on with my life. I will retire from this past and move on to the other. If my future doesn’t end up well, I will try again and choose for another future. Stopping is not a solution for me. As life goes, moving will always be there for me.

I am now writing in a blog that I can’t understand. My thoughts are just empty now, got shallow from the stress and all-day work. I even have an ugly scratch on my nose now. I guess I’m losing my self-esteem now, maybe not too obvious but it is. I’m also worrying about my cellphone load if I can consume all of it within two months or will it just expire. I also wish I can relax in a beach or take a vacation in a tranquile place.

Now, how was my thought this day. For me, it is simply nothing.